SLIDE SHOW, 70'S STYLE

I was watching a slot on breakfast TV about a young bloke called Lee, who, over a period of 3 years has collected random slides from people he didn't know, sent to him and put them together in a charming book entitled 'When we were young'  (or similar) and you can send your old slides to his Instagram account called Lee's anonymous slides . He will collate them. They are a random selection of people in the 60's and 70's when slides and projector shows were a popular way of entertaining your family at home.

This prompted me to remember a certain summer evening when my father decided he would put on a show of himself, his wife Doris and their little son on holiday in India.  Doris was born in India and their son was born there , my father met her when he went over there for business, leaving behind a pregnant wife and two little girls .After his wife gave birth in London, Doris gave birth to his son 6 months later in India.

 He fancied himself as a good photographer, being a megalomaniac, nothing could be further from the truth. Eagerly setting about setting up a screen in the living room, and assembling the dining room chairs to create a viewers gallery he was excited to show off his photographic cinematic skills.

My Nan turned up from across the road, all the while grumbling about why her presence was needed.

"Why do we have to look through your holiday snaps Masden ?" she grumbled.

"It will be fun Mam, wait and see , you will enjoy it!" he pleaded.

All set up, and seated, we jumped when the screen snapped shut in front of us making us all jump !

Springing up to re assembled it , Marsden switched the lights off and drew the curtains to start the show .I was there reluctantly as well, as I was heartedly sick of my fathers showing off. His ego was big enough with out having to add congratulations about his film, showing him and his then girlfriend splashing around in the ocean having a lovely time, when I was only too aware of how the lives of his wife and children at home was panning out.

Being one of the two little girls he left behind, at the time of the film being shot, we did not know where or how he was, or indeed the existence of the little boy, who had replaced us in his affections.

But enough of that, back to his showing off and the film. It started off easily enough, wonky shots of them, happy and sunny waving at the camera. The panoramic scans were far to fast making one dizzy

Quite boring, for me as well, but I dutifully sat there listening to the running commentary from my father to my Nan, ! We were here going to here.etc" My Nan was suitablly impressed, which was what my father strived to achieve.

There was the usual shots of people knees and sky, as I watched I realised there was absolutely no editing involved. It became quite humorous, but the icing on the cake was when they boarded a ferry to traverse a river the shot suddenly and abruptly went blank. We all sat there, whilst looking at a white screen, but unusually could still hear the chatter of their voices as they went on their journey.

After a minute or so , my Nan looked at my Dad quizzically saying 

"What is this Marsden? Has the film gone off?" 

"Errr No, wait a bit, it will come on again in a bit" came the reply. 

Another few minutes passed, we all sat in silence with only the whir of the projector and background noise of jumbled voices for entertainment.

" What is that ?"I asked  

 Looking at his wife he said "You left the camera on !"

 "Well I didn't know!" she replied indignantly. 

More minutes passed and the penny dropped.

"Are we looking at the inside of Doris's bag?" I asked

Refusing to reply he looked ruefully at the floor. But we all had to continue to look at the screen. Being heartedly fed up at this point, prompted me to cry out 

"I can't believe we are sitting here looking at a film of the inside of Dori's bag !" Really?"  I hrrrrmphed

Fed up of the pantomime I was coerced into being in , I got up and stomped off and left them all sitting there. staring at a film of the insides of Doris's bag.

Later, in the sanctuary of my room, I laughed out loud at what just occurred - Real sitcom material !